Guts' sword has never looked better than in my crooked, weak, dainty grip, while I'm roaring like the fiercest housecat you ever did see.

I am the one true king. I started this war, plunged Skyrim into chaos. I brought you into this sword and I can take you out of it. Say goodbye to your legs. Let me introduce you to my great-, great-, great-, GREAT-greatsword. The end is nigh, may God have mercy on your sword. Damocles. Dragon Bone Crusher. KUGS. Step the wrong way and you will perish. This man understands that adversity and existence are one and the same. You kind of sword like a baka. While you were busy reading this text, I was busy studying the blade. The pen is mightier than the just kidding, not even once baby.

Artwork by KINKAXA KINKAXA, and jeez what a legend

Also for real, like be completely honest with me here-- there is no cooler medieval-esc or adjacent weapon than an enormous, hulking slab of GREATSWORD, right? Like, c'mon, I haven't even gotten even started.